I guess I should talk about me.....

How do you start when so much time has passed? I'll go in order of what comes to mind, not importance. First, I'm an auntie again!!! Bently Elmer White was born on 4/4/11, awsome birthday!! He was 8lbs 1-2ounces and 21 inches long. I think it was a total of like 20 hour labor. Go Kayla!!! For her first child too!!! I love watching them be parents. :) I think Kayla was born to be a mother. He is absolutely perfect. So cute and just a blessing. The funniest part was when they had to explain to the doctors and nurses that they were actually married and had been for 2 years! The hospital just like assumed they were boyfriend and girlfriend. I died laughing.
I also graduated! I am now a certified phlebotomist and not really doing anything with it. I have an amazing job at Harmon's as a barista that pays me well so I'm content with where I am, but it was nice to feel like I accomplished something.
I'm 36 days clean. I'm very proud of myself for reaching that. I did it and I did it alone. Well, I had my family but after replapsing I lost that privilage, and I am not very good at asking for help when I need it so I didn't have the friends to be able to be what I needed in a "sponser". But my friends were kind of my look forward to. They were the normality I wanted and the peace and kindness I needed. When everyone else rejected me and kicked me to the curb they picked me up and said that everyone makes mistakes but friends were there to pick you up when you can't.
I'm still single. No suprise there. But I'm kinda liking being single. Not that I would choose this but it's simpler. I like being free. I can do anything I want without having to "check" with someone else first. I can take off, hang out with whomever I want, spend my entire paycheck on myself, do whatever the f000 I want with no one holding me back. I've learned how to love myself and to plan my future in the terms of what I want not up in the air cus I don't have a husband. I think even if I did have a boyfriend I'd still think that way. I've found what I want my future to look like. If he wants in then we'll see.
So future? I've got no idea. I like not knowing. Keeps things interesting and on my toes. Peace!

Sober

And I don't know
This could break my heart or save me
Nothing's real
Until you let go completely
So here I go with all my thoughts I've been saving
So here I go with all my fears weighing on me

Three months and I'm still sober
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers
But I know it's never really over

And I don't know
I could crash and burn but maybe
At the end of this road I might catch a glimpse of me
So I won't worry about my timing, I want to get it right
No comparing, second guessing, no not this time

Three months and I'm still breathing
Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in but I know
It's never really over, no

Three months and I'm still standing here
Three months and I'm getting better yeah
Three months and I still am

Three months and it's still harder now
Three months I've been living here without you now
Three months yeah, three months

Three months and I'm still breathing
Three months and I still remember it
Three months and I wake up

Three months and I'm still sober

Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers